Father Won’t Follow Your Rules – What Do You Do?

7172946100_2711b1f55f_zGina, a family child care provider, called me with a problem and asked for my advice.

“A father in my program won’t follow my rules. He refuses to notify me when his schedule changes, so I don’t know what days his child will be here.

He and the mother are divorced and he’s responsible for dropping off and picking up the child three days a week. I’ve talked to him many times about this, but he won’t tell me, even a day or two in advance, when his child will be in my care for that week.

It could be one, two or three days a week, but I never know in advance. My policies say that parents need to inform me before the week begins what days their child will be in attendance for that week.”

I offered a variety of suggestions to Gina of how she might want to resolve this problem:

* Have the mother talk to him about following your rules.

* Give the father a written notice that he if he continues to ignore your rules, he will suffer a consequence:

        * You will charge him an extra fee for failing to notify you in advance

        * You will terminate care.

Gina didn’t like any of these options. She didn’t want to put more pressure on the mother. She didn’t think charging extra fees would change the father’s behavior. She loved the child and didn’t want to terminate care.

This is the beginning of an article I’ve posted on childcareinfo.com. In the rest of the article I recommend what Gina should do to resolve her conflict.

Childcareinfo.com is a community for family child care providers and parents that offers a wide variety of resources including recipes, a blog, and a newsletter.  It serves as a clearinghouse for many online resources (children’s activities, training opportunities, equipment, and more).

Childcareinfo.com was created by Minute Menu to offer free assistance that will help the family child care community grow.

Tom Copeland – www.tomcopelandblog.com

Image credit: https://www.flickr.com/photos/seiulocal509/

Contracts & Policies bookFor more on how to resolve conflicts with parents, see my Family Child Care Contracts & Policies.

Categories: Contracts & Policies

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